Is It Worth The Risk? Seriously? Part 1 of 3

The Situation

Suppose you needed to buy a book. Suppose you could find it, with effort, after a few days of hard work. As in, 16 hours of work driving around looking for it in various libraries, and that only to borrow it... or perhaps find it already checked out. For whatever reason, this book simply cannot be found on the Internet. You have to get it in person. So you can drive and drive... or...

You can buy that book at The Perfect Bookstore. Where the Internet fails, this store comes through. They always have every book. You have never left that store disappointed. Never. Ever. And — get this! — it's just a few blocks from your house. And the prices are cheap!! Way cheap. Do you search somewhere else? Or do you get your book at The Perfect Bookstore?

Um... the latter, of course! That bookstore sounds awesome!

But wait.

Suppose you knew that this store didn't just have books. It also carried explosive devices. Loaded and lethal explosive devices.

[Yes, this story is getting a little weird, but just humor me and don't ask too many questions...]

Now these explosive devices that I speak of are only on display in certain aisles. So if you're really careful you can just get your book, get through checkout, and beat a hasty retreat from the store. Do you still get your book at The Perfect Bookstore?

Um.... I suppose.... but I won't bring the kids into the store with me!

But wait.

Suppose that this store places magnets in these aisles. You can literally get sucked into them if you enter the store with a lot of metallic stuff on your person. Do you still get your book at The Perfect Bookstore?

Um.... I guess.... but I won't bring the kids and I'll also be sure to empty my pockets and remove my watch before entering the store. I do need that book, after all! You said I really needed that book, right? With care I can accomplish in a couple of minutes what takes several days of work to do elsewhere!!!

But wait.

Suppose that this store requires that you put on a full metal suit at the door before you enter the store. Some sort of anti-theft mandate. Really weird... but those are the rules. But... this is a store with magnetized aisles full of deadly explosives! Do you still get your book at The Perfect Bookstore?

Um.... Maybe not. Not without suction cups attached to my feet. Can I anchor myself to the doors with rope? How important is this book, anyway?

Well I'll stop the silly story here and get to the point.

I hinted at the outset that this bookstore was even better than the Internet. In fact, ladies and gentlemen, The Perfect Bookstore IS the Internet. Those metal suits? Our fleshly bodies.

...And I don't think I need to explain to anyone what sorts of flesh-oriented-magnets can be found in the dangerous aisles of the Internet.

Happy shopping!

(This blog continues with Part 2)